The Simpsons

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The simpsons
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Marge, you gotta watch out. Your little boy, Bart, could have been eaten by that pony!

</i> Barney

Homer: Marge! You waited for me.
Marge: Er.
Homer: Okay, Marge, let's go.
Marge: I'll catch up to you.
Homer: Marge, I'm taking the car.
Marge: I'll walk.
Homer: This late? Through the bad neighborhood?
Marge: Yeah.
Homer: Marge
Marge: Go home! You're bad luck.
Homer: Wait! I see what's happening here. You're just mad because everyone in this town loves gambling except for you. Well that's just sad.

Lisa: Do you get the feeling this family is disintegrating? I mean, we haven't had a meal with Mom all week. And she hasn't even started my costume for the geography pageant.
Bart: Pipe down, sister. I gotta book a new act for tonight. Turns out that Liza Minnelli impersonator was really Liza Minnelli. (shudders)

Lisa: Dad, Mom said she'd be home to help me with my costume and she's not, and the geography pageant is tonight!
Homer: Lisa, your mom still loves you. It's just that she has a career now. She's a slot-jockey.

Homer: So uh...what do you guys think of Mindy?
Carl: We love cake. Anybody see the game last night?
Homer: Yeeeah. That Mindy seems real nice.
Lenny: Homer, what's with you? You're talking during a coffee break!
Carl: Yeah, usually you just take the box of donuts into the bathroom!
Homer: Mindy has a motorcycle!

Bart: (seeing his reflection in Milhouse's glasses) I'm a nerd!
Milhouse: (seeing his reflection in Bart's glasses) So am I!

(Singing) Oh Mindy.
You came and you gave without flaking,
but I sent you Ben Gay.
Oh Andy
You kissed me and stopped me from something...

Homer

Get back to work, Stuart!

Mr. Burns (<i>to a duck</i>)

Oh Marge, you came and you found me a turkey on my vacation away from worky.

Homer

Think unsexy thoughts think unsexy thoughts think unsexy thoughts...

Homer

(Homer and Mindy represent the nuclear power plant at the National Energy Convention.)
Man: Thanks for poisoning the planet, bastards!
Mindy: Get bent!
Man #2: No more Chernobyls!
Homer: Go to Hell! (Throws a brick at him)

Another day, another box of stolen pens.

Homer
Displaying quotes 349 - 360 of 624 in total

The Simpsons Season 5 Quotes

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

Homer: Aw, twenty dollars? I wanted a peanut!
Homer's Brain: Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts.
Homer: Explain how!
Homer's Brain: Money can be exchanged for goods and services.