Popular Perry Cox Quotes
Dr. Cox: Newbie! Almost forgot about you!
J.D.: You know what, save your breath! I'm about to get in a hot-air balloon and get Evil Knievel on my own ass! Come on, Elliot! Let's go French kiss the sun!
Dr. Cox: All right, knuckleheads! I need one of you to win this talent show!
Elliot: I can do Shakespeare in German!... In college I double majored in theatre and classic languages.
J.D.: Does that degree come with headgear and allergies?
Dr. Cox: You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?
Jordan: Yeah! That-that-ohhhh! That we invite Muscles, here, to hang a banner in our bedroom that says "It takes three to party"?
Dr. Cox: Hold your horses. Just tell me who the last person hired was, would you please?
Kenny: Looks like you folks could use a little refresher! Serving people like you who save lives every day, makes me happier than a kitten chasing a leaky cow! God bless ya! God bless ya.
Dr. Cox: I have to fire Opie, don't I?
Jordan: You think?
Dr. Kelso: What do you want, Perry?
Dr. Cox: Bob, enough of the stinking budget cuts, already!
Dr. Kelso: Noted. Now, if you will excuse me, I have to fire someone.
Dr. Cox: Oh, baloney, old man!
Dr. Cox: Hey, Kenny, once again I'm...I'm real sorry.
Dr. Kelso: Welcome to my world. Now, imagine going home to my wife.
Dr. Cox: Let's take a look at our other options. Gandhi? You appear to be a man that is utterly without talent. Unless, of course, you wanna count the fact that you are the twentieth-best basketball player in a predominately white hospital? Jordan, your only skill is illegal in twenty-six states.
Jordan: It's twenty-seven. Arkansas buckled.
Dr. Cox: Carla, that makes you my girl. Hell, we could crank up the humidity and watch your hair explode, that'd be terrific.
Dr. Cox: Why? Why am I having such a hard time with this?
Jordan: Because apparently you have girl parts!
Dr. Cox: Hell yeah, I wanted to see you. I wanted to tell you that I... I think you're doing a great job. Boy, that meatloaf today, it was-it was virtually hairless.
Kenny: I took off the gloves and... it makes the hair a lot easier to... pick out.
Jordan: Oh, for God's sake, Perry! Adjust your bra, man up, and fire the one with the least pathetic story!
Dr. Cox: Do you really think I know any of these people's stories?
Janitor: Well, let me fill you in. First we have Hank - four kids, trying to make it on a dishwasher's salary. Next one is Mike - lost half his leg in a motorcycle accident. And then there's Judy - been here thirty years, just two away from retirement.
Jordan: You're...you're friends with all these people?
Janitor: You kidding me? I read their files. I read everybody's files, Ms. Manic-Depressive, Dr. Drinks-A-Lot.
Dr. Cox: I see that. It seems you two have worn the same outfit. Barbie, if it's of any consolation, it looks slightly better on you.
Elliot: No, I'm talking about... Thank you!
Dr. Kelso: If there is one thing I have learned it is that you can’t schedule love.
Dr. Cox: I think your credit card statement would beg to differ.
