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South-park

Cold sore is what girls call it, Kenny. It's actually herpes.

Cartman: I have balls.
Red: Yeah, little swishy boba tea balls.
Cartman: Still balls.

No no no, I'm telling you guys, music videos have devolved to nothing but pretty girls, wearing skintight clothes, singing about their vajayjay. Used to be chicks talking about relationships, now it's all my vajayjay this, my vajayjay that. But clearly that's what sells.

So God makes it rain frogs? That just seems kind of mean to frogs, Kyle!

Mr. Billings: Our entire business is based on fun and safety!
Cartman: This isn't safe or fun!

Those cryptozoologists don't know what they're talking about. They just gave me a case of the Hebrew-jeebies, that's all

What you're looking at there is a Jewpacabra. It's like a sasquatch, only more elusive, more ferocious, and a little more greedy.

You can't scare a Jewpacabra! Don't forget Butters, we're dealing with a creature that drinks blood, hides in the night, and has no belief in the divinity of Christ.

Saying something is so 2000 and anything is so 2009, you asswipe!

We got crappy jewelry, now all we need are some old people.

You may suck our collective balls, sir.

Toilet time is the last bastion of American freedom.

Displaying quotes 25 - 36 of 498 in total

South Park Quotes

James Cameron doesn't do what James Cameron does for James Cameron. James Cameron does what James Cameron does because James Cameron is James Cameron!

James Cameron

Mr. Garrison Sr.: Would you have sex with your son to save his life?
Man at bar 1: Oh, this is one of them scruples questions ain't it?
Man at bar 2: No, no I got a better one: Would you have sex with your motherto save your father's life?
Man at bar 1: You mean like if someone had a gun to your father's head and said if you don't have sex with her, I'll kill him?
Bartender: If a killer put a knife to my throat and said "have sex with your mother or I'm gonna kill your father while having sex with you, I would have sex with myself.

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