George Costanza Quotes
George: My whole life has been a complete waste of time.Jerry: And there's so much more to go.
The truth? You want the truth? It is your earrings! It is the chopsticks, but it's so much more! You're pretentious! You call everyone by their full name! You call my doorman, Sammy, "Samuel" but you didn't even say "Samuel", you went "Samuelle!" Papie-ay mach-ay? What is papie-ay mach-ay?
Elaine: You're extremely...careful...with money.
George: I'm cheap? You think I'm CHEAP? How could you say that to me? I can't
believe this. How could you say that to me?
Elaine: You asked me to!
George: You should have lied!
Elaine: HUH, so should you.
George: I mean I'm not really working right now.
Elaine: I know.
George: When I was working I SPENT baby!
Jerry: Yeah, I know champagne, limos, cigars.
I've driven women to lesbianism before but never to a mental institution.
George: They give you those word association tests. I love those.Jerry: That'd be great. There's no wrong answer.George: Potato.Jerry: Tuberculosis.George: Blanket.Jerry: Leroy.George: Grass.Jerry: Tuberculosis.
George: A man gave me a massage.
Jerry: So?
George: So he had his hands and, uh, he was
Jerry: He was what?
George: He was touching and rubbing.
I think it moved.
I've shifted, this was a move!
It was imperceptible, but I felt it!
Roy: Don't mind her.Jerry: Oh please, I love her.George: I've just met her, but I'm very impressed.
Raymond: I used to be a flight attendant.George: Oh boy.Raymond: Ya know, why don't you open those pants, it's gonna be a lot easier that way.
George: What if it feels good?Elaine: It's supposed to feel good.George: I don't want it to feel good.