Jay Pritchett Quotes
Jay: I won't be able to hear her, she won't be able to see me.
Gloria: Well be together forever!
You'd rather kill your husband than admit you need glasses?
Manny got into a fight at The Sound of Music, got kicked out, I've never been so proud.
What ever happened to letting kids be themselves?
Gloria (whispers): It's the curse.
Jay: Not that I ever want to discourage you from whispering, but that's not a thing.
They keep their tools in a pillowcase but they have an occasions closet.
If he doesn't go to Columbia, Columbia comes to me.
I'm down there for a funeral. It's such a sad event and I end up finding something that I thought was lost forever. This beautiful moment that meant so much to both of us, set against the backdrop of fighting commies. There's your movie.
I was shipping off to Vietnam, you had the ass of a young Ann Margaret.
Manny: What kind of man writes poetry on the computer?
Jay: You could've ended that sentence after poetry.
Gloria: He's a lying, scheming little sneak. That's my son.
Jay: Our son.
What did I say about these flowered blankets for him? He's starting to take after Hugh Hefner over there.