Jay Pritchett Quotes
What ever happened to letting kids be themselves?
Gloria (whispers): It's the curse.
Jay: Not that I ever want to discourage you from whispering, but that's not a thing.
They keep their tools in a pillowcase but they have an occasions closet.
If he doesn't go to Columbia, Columbia comes to me.
I'm down there for a funeral. It's such a sad event and I end up finding something that I thought was lost forever. This beautiful moment that meant so much to both of us, set against the backdrop of fighting commies. There's your movie.
I was shipping off to Vietnam, you had the ass of a young Ann Margaret.
Manny: What kind of man writes poetry on the computer?
Jay: You could've ended that sentence after poetry.
Gloria: He's a lying, scheming little sneak. That's my son.
Jay: Our son.
What did I say about these flowered blankets for him? He's starting to take after Hugh Hefner over there.
Gloria: You had a 3 hour nap on Sunday.
Jay: I was tired.
Gloria: From what, your 2 hour nap on Saturday?
Jay: This behavior of yours is not gonna fly when you lose your looks.
Gloria: Awww, you'll be long gone by then.
There's no such thing as a professional Broadway enthusiast.