Lisa Simpson Quotes
Homer: I can't wait for my first fire. Is that one?
Lisa: That's just someone barbecuing.
Homer: Is that one?
Bart: That's a guy with red hair.
- Permalink: I can't wait for my first fire. Is that one? That's just someo...
Lisa: Bart, come with me. I'll take you to someone who will make you feel better.
Bart: Is it my rabbit, Cottontail? The one who went to live upstate?
Lisa: He died, Bart. Dad buried him in the backyard. But not in that order.
- Permalink: Bart, come with me. I'll take you to someone who will make you f...
(to Marge about her Internet surfing success) I'm proud of you, Mom! You're like Christopher Columbus. You discovered something millions of people knew about before you.
- Permalink: I'm proud of you, Mom! You're like Christopher Columbus. You dis...
Homer: Lisa, honey, I bought you something. A DVD!
Lisa: Not interested!
Homer: It's a documentary! By the BBC! In cooperation with Canal+!
Lisa: Ah! Gimme gimme gimme!!
- Permalink: Lisa, honey, I bought you something. A DVD! Not interested! ...
Lisa: And this website will tell you the weather.
Marge: Sunny? I never have to look out the window again.
- Permalink: And this website will tell you the weather. Sunny? I never hav...
Lisa: You can't give me a yellow card! You're my father!
Homer: When I put on these shorts, I'm not your father anymore. And judging by how tight they are, I'm never gonna be anyone else's either.
- Permalink: You can't give me a yellow card! You're my father! When I put ...
Dad, you're out of shape even for an American.
- Permalink: Dad, you're out of shape even for an American.
(After the family puts their special items in the safe, smoke begins coming out.)
Bart: What's that comin' out of the safe?
Homer: I don't know--Maybe the Krusty doll accidentally turned on the car's headlights, which focused on the cologne bottle, causing it to boil and soon explode.
Lisa: Dad, that's ridiculous!
(The safe blows apart from the explosion.)
Krusty Doll: What's the deal with this California pizza? If I wanted cheese and fruit--(As it burns from the flames and begins melting)--I'd...have...to...(Melts into a plastic puddle)
Marge: (Devastated when the family album falls apart into ashes) Nooooooo! It's gone! That family album was a record of my accomplishments! It's like what a resume is for a man.
Lisa: I agree, Mom. It's very sad. But we'll have to move on. It's not like we can restage all our family photos.
Marge: (Becoming delighted upon the idea) Restage the photos!
Bart: Lisa you fool, you've doomed us all!
(Marge quickly puts a baby bonnet on him and snaps a shot with her camera as he cries out before she takes a second shot, which is among the first ones seen in the new family album.)
- Permalink: What's that comin' out of the safe? I don't know--Maybe the Kr...
Lisa: Now we can enjoy Boxingham Palace in peace.
Bart: Want to melt it with a hose?
Lisa: Sure I guess, a couple of birds pooped on it over here.
- Permalink: Now we can enjoy Boxingham Palace in peace. Want to melt it wi...