Peter Griffin Quotes
Peter: Fresh air is bad for a kid. Look at Michael J. Fox.
Peter: I don't know.
Peter: I am going to the Clam and I am getting my booth back! And Meg, you're gay.
Meg: No, I'm not.
Peter: You like guys, right?
Peter: That's called being gay.
Scumbag: Smells like this guy's already wet himself.
Peter: Don't flatter yourself--that was from this morning.
We're supposed to stick together! Like goatee guys at a barbecue!
Says 'Glenn Quagmire.' But if you squint and imagine it says 'Peter Griffin,' it says 'Peter Griffin'!
Peter: Peter: My hog cannot partake in the slop this evening.
Quagmire: What was Simon without Garfunkel?
Peter: Wildly successful?
Chris: So did you get a lot of trim on the road?
Peter: Chris, that's wildly inappropriate
Peter: Aren't you supposed to be running?
Chicken: Don't talk to me. You have a bad reputation in the chicken community.
Lois: Last night was the best sex I ever had.
Peter: Me too. We haven't done it like that since we were engaged, but allowed to sleep with other people.
Lois: What are you talking about?
Man: You renounced your citizenship?
Peter: Oh, I did that on the Italian "Shut-up-a-You-Facebook."
Meg: He's going to kill me! I can already picture my funeral!
[cutaway to a graveside service, Peter runs in and throws Meg's dead corpse under another casket]
Peter: Thanks, didn't want to pay for the hole.