Family Guy
Sundays 9:00 PM on FOXFavorite Family Guy Quotes
Peter: Now Quagmire, when you introduce us to the ladies by the pool, I'm a millionaire, Joe's a war hero, and Quagmire's Magic Johnson.
Cleveland: I own a lot of theaters, I hope you don't know much else about me.
Never judge a book by it's cover, or a movie.
Peter
It's probably nothing, but there's a stain on the rug in the shape of a little kid.
Joe
Well, for the next 72 hours, I'm going to be harder to find than a nice cat.
Brian
Well, if anyone knows how to pull out it's Quagmire!
Stewie
You know, I have a lot of fun up here in my room.
Stewie
When you were poor, you were always a douche, but at least you came by it honestly. But now, screwing over the people that helped you! I don't know how you sleep at night!
Quagmire
Even though I know you never liked me, you still helped me when I really needed it. That says a lot about your character. I'm ashamed of myself, because I am none of the things you are. You're honest, and direct, and compassionate, aaaaand that's 72 hours! Enjoy your crap-hole dumbass!
Brian
Well last night me and Brian got drunk and ate the turkey, but before you get mad we also ate the salad.
Peter
No, but why are you saying the dogs name before dads.
Chris
Hi there folks! Hand over the turkey!
Well the fat man is never going to get back in time, and with him gone that makes you the man of the house.
Stewie
