Family Guy

Family Guy Season 8 Quotes (Page 7)

Season 8 Episode 3: "Spies Reminiscent of Us"

Dan Aykroyd: If these signatures are correct, Mayor West is located just a third of a kilometer that way just over this rise
Stewie: That's what you said a third of a kilometer ago
Dan Aykroyd: Perhaps you'd like to do something besides criticizing me and quoting my movies
Stewie: You just watch your mouth mister
 • Rating: Unrated

Stewie: Wow, those are the russian people? I mean granted you do think of bears on unicycles when you think of the russian people, but they're all bears on unicycles?
Dan Aykroyd: Bears on unicycles, every single on of them
Chevy Chase: So what do we do now?
Dan Aykroyd: We're undercover US agents in a hostile foreign environment, we just gotta make sure we don't do anything that makes us stick out
Guard: Hey, they're not bears on unicycles! You're under arrest!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dan Aykroyd: Now you two individuals live here...are there any local residents whom you've seen acting strangely?
Stewie: Well, there's a pedophile up the street that nobody seems to be doing anything about, but it's mainly because he's so funny
 • Rating: Unrated

Dan Aykroyd: The activation phrase was something no one would ever think to mutter
Stewie: What is it?
Dan Aykroyd: The phrase is "gosh that itlain family at the next table sure is quiet"
 • Rating: Unrated

Peter [about Dan Aykroyd and Chevy Chase]: Oh my god, I'm eating dinner with two of the three ghost busters
Chevy Chase: Actually, I wasn't in that
Peter: Look at these guys, can't take a compliment
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Peter [to Dan Aykroyd and Chevy Chase]: I'd sure love it if you guys come to dinner at my house tonight. My wife's cooking sucks, but I'd sure love to look at you.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 8 Episode 2: "Family Goy"

Jesus: I am a Jew
Peter: Prove it. What's a 9% tip on a $200 dinner?
Jesus: It's $18, which is very fair
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Peter: This family believes in the Easter bunny. He died for our sins in that helicopter crash
 • Rating: 4.7 / 5.0

Meg: Mom, is sodomy illegal if you're Jewish?
Lois: I hope so Meg, I really do
Peter: It's not, Lois.... it's not
 • Rating: 4.9 / 5.0

Lois: Mom, you're Jewish?
Barbara: I'm sorry we never told you dear, when we were married, your father made me conceal the fact so we could get into country clubs

 • Rating: Unrated

Lois: Peter, stop that! We're not having sex, I just told you I have a lump!
Peter: I have a lump too and mine's easier to get rid of
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Chris: Hey dad, where you going with that cutout?
Peter: Oh hey kids, this is Kathy, we're designing lifestyle products together. It's completely legitimate, but don't tell your mother!
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 8 Episode 1: "Road to the Multiverse"

Stewie: We're in the robot chicken universe
Peter: Will you guys move, you're blocking the tv
Chris: Look! GI Joe, Transformers, Thunder Cats, He-Man. Yay! Those shows existed!
Stewie: how does it feel to be on a major network for 30 seconds
Chris: $!%@ you!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Carnie: I guess 185 pounds
Adam West: Wrong, I'm 95 percent helium
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Stewie: Take your stinkin' paws off me you damn dirty dog
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Stewie: Gosh Brian, I sure hope this next leap, will be the leap home
 • Rating: 3.5 / 5.0

Quagmire: Thanks honey, say hi to your husband. [device on his belt beeps] Oh, I've got AIDS again, better take my NyQuil Cold, Flu and AIDS. [takes pill] All gone!
 • Rating: Unrated

Carnie: Step right up, step right up! You won't believe your eyes. Step right up and see the amazing half man, half clam.
Peter: What a ripoff, it's just Kim Cattrall sitting Indian style
 • Rating: Unrated

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