How I Met Your Mother

Mondays 8:00 PM on CBS
How i met your mother
TV Fanatic Works Better with Prime Instant Video
Try it Now for Free and Instantly Watch How I Met Your Mother.

I'm in the upright and locked position.

Barney

Hang on to this girl Ted - hang on and never let go.

Barney

You "right now-ed" Scooter?

Marshall

Poster whore.

Lily

I've been the hookee and the hooker.

Robin

Oh Ted, she's totally got you on the hook.

Lily

I don't want to loose you, big brown eyes.

Tiffany

Yes you can borrow my tea cup pig.

Barney

Being single sucks - turns you into a crazy person.

Ted

This phone is cursed - cursed I tell you.

Barney

It's called the 'naked man' - I read it about on some guy's blog.

Don

I hate him - I just want to attack him, rip his clothes off, and spank his little bottom until it turns red - Shut up!

Robin
Displaying quotes 109 - 120 of 267 in total

How I Met Your Mother Season 5 Quotes

My panties would hit the floor so hard they'd end up halfway to China.

Robin

Barney: Barney Stinson is back on the market. Mothers, lock up your daughters. Daughters, lock up your MILSWANCA's.
Marshall: MILSWANCA's?
Ted: Oh wait, I can get this. Mothers I'd Like to Sleep With and Never Call Again
Barney: Correct, circle gets a square

× Close Ad