I'm not homeless, I told you. I have a home, I'm just not welcome there.

Frank [to Bianca]

I know! Lets get crack!

Bianca [to Frank]

V: You know, having a Russian sex worker isn't ideal for child care.
Kev: Yeah, but she does come in handy.

We should clarify something, because for me personally, part of feeling alive is being alive!

Frank [to Bianca]

There's always gonna be people that are going to try and fix us and you can never make those people happy, like it breaks their heart just to look at you.

Monica [to Ian]

Fiona: So are you and Kev...
V: Giving it another try.

Bianca: Let's go get drunk and buy a gun.
Frank: A gun?
Bianca: Yeah.

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Amanda: Does she make you happy or is it just about the sex?
Lip: Sex, mostly.

Fiona: You can't have a boy in your bed!
Debbie: Why not? You do!
Fiona: I am a grownup.
Debbie: I'm pregnant!
Fiona: No you're not. No you're not.

Why won't you ever let me be happy?

Debbie [to Fiona]

Ian, Ian, I'm finally happy. People like us, we can be happy. I love him and that's the most important thing, to find somebody to love, right? Who loves you back for who you are. I want that for you.

Monica

Could I possibly be doing a worse job at raising these kids?

Fiona [to Gus]

Shameless Quotes

Lip: What exactly does hooked up mean?
Kevin: Last I checked penis goes into the vagina.

Surround sound bitching is the only thanks I get.

Frank