Bianca: Thank you.
Frank: For what?
Bianca: You have made me happy. I've never been very happy.

Happy is overrated. Grow up, Fiona.

Sean

Get up old man.

Fiona

Use the downstairs toilet if you're so fucking desperate.

Debbie

Frank: What is the matter with you people? She was my soul mate.
Debbie: She probably killed herself just to get away from you.

I don't know how much more of that I can take without stabbing him in the neck with a broken beer bottle.

Fiona

Guess our reputation as a shit hole is still safe.

Waitress

I'm sick of hearing about your dead girlfriend.

Fiona

Fiona: Does he talk?
Carl: I got him covered.

He's coming back. His parents are ass holes.

Debbie

I'm not killing my baby. It's not a baby. It's a few cells.

Debbie

Carl: Knives are in the drawer if you want to do a home abortion.
Fiona: Carl!

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Shameless Quotes

Everytime she pees on the stick it's bad news and then I get depressed thinking about my husband banging my mom cause we selfishly wanna have a baby with some of our DNA.

V

Gus: See you at two.
Fiona: Wouldn't miss it.