South Park
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy CentralSouth Park Season 4 Quotes
Oh what a gay time we shall have, and I do mean gay as in festive, not as in penetration of the bum.
Pocket
Pip: Joe, do you know anything about girls?
Joe: Sure. They're those things with vaginas in them.
Pip: Yes, but do you know anything about them?
And they all lived happily ever after, except for Pocket who died of Hepatitis B.
Narrator
STOP your metal orange, you bastard! You never want a tablespoon of nigh'ingale droppin's, you me'al-poundin' fairy! And you! Why don't you get a job?! You're eight years old now!
Mrs. Joe
Indeed after watching this show, you'll know the timeless classic as if you've read the Cliff Notes themselves.
Malcolm McDowell
Is that right you smelly little bastard?
Estella
Ahhh...Dickens. The imagery of cobblestone streets, cragging London buildings, and nutmeg-filled Yorkshire puddings. Hello, I'm a British person.
Malcolm McDowell
If Ms. Havisham is determined to do this to others, let's go KICK HER ASS!
Pip
GOB-BLES!
Timmy
Actor: (singing) Why not use a trick we actors use, cover your eyes and ears to see what it would be like to be blind and deaf. See what plays inside your mind.
(Cartman does so and it is followed by a montage of horrific scenes, the holocaust, someone on fire, grizzly operations, a dead rat being eaten by another rat, etc.)
Cartman: (takes off blindfold and ear muffs) WHOA!
Actor: Anything useful?
Cartman: No, just the stuff i usually see when I close my eyes.
Cartman: Kyle, why do you do these things to me?
Kyle: I didn't do anything to you; Timmy saw the turkey and wanted to get it, what did you want me to say to him?
Cartman: You say: "NO TIMMY, YOU CAN'T HAVE THAT TURKEY! BAD TIMMY!"
Stan: Where's Gobbles?
Cartman: I don't know.
(Stan and Kyle look at him doubtfully)
Cartman: I DON'T KNOW! I might have tried to have Gobbles crushed by a stage light but that's it, I'm not an asshole.
