The Simpsons Season 3 Quotes
Lisa: Wow, Dad!
Bart: Homer, can I get you a beer?
Lisa: No, I want to get him a beer.
Homer: Kids, kids, kids! You can each get me a beer.
- Permalink: Wow, Dad! Homer, can I get you a beer? No, I want to get him...
Lisa: You stink Strawberry, we want home run Homer!
Bart: Darryl... Darryl.
Bart and Lisa: Darryl... Darryl!
Marge: Kids, that's not very nice
Lisa: Mom, they're professional athletes, they're used to this kind of thing, it rolls right off their back!
(Cut to close up to Strawberry, who begins to tear up.)
- Permalink: You stink Strawberry, we want home run Homer! Darryl... Darryl...
Homer: Oh no! I don't want you to see me sitting on my worthless butt!
Bart: We've seen it, dad!
- Permalink: Oh no! I don't want you to see me sitting on my worthless butt! ...
Marge: Homey, come to bed
Homer: (goes back to bed with a plainer) Homer, go back to the garage!
- Permalink: Homey, come to bed Homer, go back to the garage!
Umpire: Okay, let's go over the ground rules. You can't leave first until you chug a beer. Any man scoring has to chug a beer. You have to chug a beer at the top of all odd-numbered innings. Oh, and the fourth inning is the beer inning.
Wiggum: Hey, we know how to play softball!
- Permalink: Okay, let's go over the ground rules. You can't leave first unti...
Ozzie Smith: How long does it take to see this thing? I'm kind of in a hurry.
Mystery Spot Owner: Well it's hard to say my friend, once you go in, you may never come out.
Ozzie Smith: Wow! (puts the money forward) One please! (walks inside and falls into the bottomless hole) Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!
- Permalink: How long does it take to see this thing? I'm kind of in a hurry....
Hypnotist: You are all very good players
Team: We are all very good players.
Hypnotist: You will beat Shelbyville.
Team: We will beat Shelbyville.
Hypnotist: You will give 110 percent.
Team: That's impossible no one can give more than 100 percent. By definition that's the most any one can give.
- Permalink: You are all very good players We are all very good players. ...
Officer Eddie: (reading Steve Sax's license) Well well, Steve Sax, from New York City.
Officer Lou: I heard some guy got killed in New York City and they never solved the case. But you wouldn't know anything about that now, would you, Steve?
(Lou and Eddie laugh)
Steve Sax: But there are hundreds of unsolved murders in New York City.
Officer Lou: You don't know when to keep your mouth shut, do you, Saxxy Boy?
- Permalink: Well well, Steve Sax, from New York City. I heard some guy got...
Homer: Please please please, I want to make the team. Clemens, did I make the team?
Roger Clemens: You sure did!
Homer: I did? Woohoo! Woohoo! In your face Strawberry!
Roger Clemens: Wait a minute, are you Ken Griffey Jr.?
Roger Clemens: Sorry, didn't mean to get your hopes up.
- Permalink: Please please please, I want to make the team. Clemens, did I ma...