The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXThe Simpsons Season 4 Quotes
Son, a woman is a lot like a... a refrigerator! They're about six feet tall, 300 pounds. They make ice, and um Oh, wait a minute! Actually, a woman is more like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! But you can't stop at one, you wanna drink another woman!
Homer
Bart: I'll show them who's "just a kid!"
Marge: Bart, bedtime! I laid out your jammy-jams!
Lawyer: Your honor, I'd like to show the court just how much shrimp Mr. Simpson ate. Bring it in boys!
Aide: Eighteen thousand letters, all addressed to Santa Claus.
Lawyer: You want the People of Springfield versus Kris Kringle. That's next door.
Moe: Barney, don't steal any beer while I'm gone.
Barney: What kind of pathetic drunk do you take me for? Somebody spilled beer in this ashtray!
Uh oh, my heart just stopped..... oh, there it goes.
Barney
Homer: Zoo Keeper! Zoo Keeper! Those two monkeys are killing each other!
Zoo Keeper: (whispering) There're having sex.
Mr. Simpson, this is the most blatant case of false advertising since my case against "The Never-Ending Story"!
Lionel Hutz
Moe: Uh, Amanda Huggenkiss? Hey, I'm looking for Amanda Huggenkiss! Ah, why can't I find Amanda Huggenkiss?
Barney: Maybe your standards are too high! (bar laughs)
Moe: (To Bart) You little S.O.B.! Why, when I find out who you are, I'm going to shove a sausage down your throat and stick starving dogs in your butt!
Mr. Burns: I want you to show this woman the time of her life.
Homer: Gotcha! Marge, we're getting some drive-thru, then we're doing it twice!
Good news, boy. I found a pharmacy that carries leeches! Well, it wasn't exactaly a pharmacy. More of a bait shop.
</i> Grandpa
Maggie? Oh, you must be sick. Let's see, what's old Dr. Washburn prescibe? Do you have dropsy? The grippe? Scofula? The vapors? Jungle rot? Dandy fever? Poor man's gout? Housemaid's knee? Climatic poopow? The staggers? Dum-dum fever?
</i> Abe
Ahhh Wolfie, don't feel bad for losin'. I been wreslin' wolves since you were at your mother's teat.
Willie
