The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXThe Simpsons Season 5 Quotes
I didn't do it!
Bart
Lisa: If I ever become famous, I want it to be for something worthwhile, not because of some obnoxious fad.
Bart: Obnoxious fad?
Homer: Aw, don't worry, son. You know, they said the same thing about Urkel--that little snot boy! I'd like to smash that kid!
Bart: (Whistling Simpsons' Theme)
Marge: Bart, I've asked you not to whistle that annoying tune.
Bart: (Saluting and speaking German) Ja wohl, mein mamadant!
Don't listen to him, kid. This is a dream factory, the birthplace of magic, an enchantment! Now, I need you to go clean out my toilet.
Krusty
Lisa: Dad, maybe this will cheer you up. (plays song by blowing an empty bottle)
Homer: Oh! It doesn't work anymore.... I didn't say stop!
Homer: We'll be right back!
Kent Brockman: You don't get to say that!
(discussing the where-abouts of the buried treasure)
Homer: Nooo kidding?
Chief Wiggum: Big T, huh?
Homer: Well... I guess I'll be going to my home now and... sleep.
Chief Wiggum: Yeah... me too.... I will also go home.... for sleep.
Marge: I don't think the guns are a good idea!
Homer: Marge! We're responsible adults a--
(Gun shot)
Moe: Whoops!
Homer: And if a group of responsible adults can't handle firearms in a responsible way--
(Gun shot)
Captain McCallister: Sorry!
(gun shot)
Principal Skinner: Uh oh!
(Gun shot)
Moe: Me again...
(Gun shot)
Bart: Sorry.
Lisa: We are insured, aren't we, Mom?
Marge: Homer, tell your child what you bought when I sent you to town to get some insurance.
Homer: Curse you magic beans!
Marge: Oh, stop blaming the beans.
Ned: Hi-dilly-ho, neighborinos!
Homer: Can't talk, robbed, go Hell.
Bart: The burglar even took my stamp collection!
Lisa: You! Had a stamp collection!? (everybody laughs *phone rings*)
Nelson: Stamp collection!? Haha!
Homer: Okay, here's our new family security rules. Be home before dark, and make sure you're not followed. Lock all doors and windows.
Marge: And don't take candy from strangers.
Homer: Marge, they're only human!
