Two and a Half Men

Thursdays 8:30 PM on CBS
Two and a half men
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Lyndsey: The guest toilet is broken; I want you to fix it.
Alan: Are we role playing? I am the naughty plumber here to snake your drain.
Lyndsey: No, you are the loving boyfriend, here to fix my toilet.


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Alan Harper Quotes, Lyndsey McElroy Quotes, Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 21 Quotes, Two and a Half Men Quotes
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Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 21 Quotes

My point being, fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, I want a fully-funded 401K and a Camaro.

Berta

You know, once upon a time, a cute little boy came to live came to live in this house for a few days, maybe you've met him, and he is the pot-soaked, masturbating, couch-eating potato who eats all your cookies.

Berta