Two and a Half Men

Thursdays 8:30 PM on CBS
Two and a half men
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Alan: Why aren't you studying for your algebra final?
Jake: 'Cause I don't have to.
Alan: You don't have to study algebra.
Jake: Nope. All I gotta do is get a 67 to pass the course, and then it's adiós seventh grade, arrivederci eighth.
Alan: OK, we can cross "UN interpreter" off the job list...


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Alan Harper Quotes, Jake Harper Quotes, Two and a Half Men Season 5 Episode 19 Quotes, Two and a Half Men Quotes
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Two and a Half Men Season 5 Episode 19 Quotes

Dr. Freeman: So you're competing with your brother for the affection of an older, nurturing woman.
Charlie: Boy, you're just a one-string banjo, aren't you?

Charlie: So what do I owe you?
Dr. Freeman: Well, I get $200 an hour, you were here for 5 minutes, so why don't we just round it off and say $200?
Charlie: Man, even hookers prorate.