Two and a Half Men Review: Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt
On what was likely the most-watched episode of Two and a Half Men in history, people tuned in to the season nine premiere for one reason: to meet Ashton Kutcher's Walden Schmidt.
But before we even get there, I want to discuss the star-studded opening, starting with the ex-girlfriend ladden funeral.
From old flames such as Courtney (Jenny McCarthy) and Mia to more recent women like Chelsea and even her friend, Sherri (Jeri Ryan), thy were all there. It was vintage Two and a Half Men humor, right on down to Evelyn trying to sell the house at the funeral.
Back at the house during the second act, we still had the entire supporting cast, including Berta and Evelyn and going right on down to Judith and Herb. And that's before the celebrity buyers came in.
These were quick and cute, from John Stamos and his devil's threesome to a modern day Dharma and Greg talking divorce. The latter was an adorable nod to Lorre's past sitcom and it put a smile on my face.
Really, the show seemed like Jon Cryer and the rest of his supporting cast could have carried things without Sheen. But Chuck Lorre and company, or more likely executives at CBS, did not have faith in their existing cast, so they had to bring on the gimmick that was Mr. Ashton Kutcher.
Enter Walden Schmdt and his hung-like-a-horse tall, good-looking, rich and supposedly smart self. So, was it "Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt?"
Clearly, the shows tried to build Walden in with some sympathy by introducing him as a shell of a man after his wife left him. And all it was going to take was a threesome to bring our man back and we would all be built up with him, right?
Well, unfortunately between Kutcher's terrible acting and a horribly written character, it all just felt awkward. Was Walden supposed to be bright like his character and wealth indicated? Because all I saw was the trait that has permeated every character Kutcher has ever played: stupidity. However, unlike his lovable, iconic Kelso, there wasn't even charm. There was just... dumb luck.
I'm giving the show an appropriate 2.5 stars. Not just because of the title, but because it was pretty much half of our maximum rating. But then there had to be a second half.
Obviously, like everyone else, I'll probably give it one more week. Past that, though? 2 Broke Girls seems like much better sitcom filler to me.
Eric Hochberger is the programmer of TV Fanatic, so please forgive his mediocre writing. His programming is far better. Follow him on Twitter and/or email him. Just don't request threaded comments. They're coming.
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April 14th, 2013 6:20 PM
This show has only 8 seasons for me! Bring Charlie back, Ashton is a total miscast!
April 6th, 2013 10:16 PM
I hate seeing Ashton on this show it just doesn't seem right. He's not funny, the show is now the same they should have just ended it and kept their pride after Charlize departure. But now it just not the same show any more. Not good.
March 8th, 2013 1:08 PM
down the tube since charlie sheen left. getting tired of seeing allen masturbate
January 12th, 2013 4:12 PM
2.5 is no longer funny, plizz bring back charlie sheen, without him the show is over to me
December 24th, 2012 12:42 PM
The writers have really lost the plot on this one. It was very painful watching just one episode but I tried a second and did myself an injury. I for one will stick to the re-runs. It's a real shame or maybe its just gone past it's sell by date.
I hope they will never re-run this awful, awful this new series.
November 9th, 2012 12:00 AM
This show needs a facelift! Since Walden arrived, the show is just plain dumb! Ashton is really miscast for the show... Alan and Charlie had a chemistry that just isn't there anymore....if the show can't have Charlie Sheen anymore, than they need to find a "replacement" for him! This cast just doesn't have the chemistry anymore.... Very disappointing for a show that I looked forward to seeing every week!
October 8th, 2012 10:02 PM
The show is in its sunset seasons. They're using celebrity props to get a quick surge in ratings here and there but long term - this is a sinking ship. Lorre and Co. are focusing on Big Bang, Mike and Molly.
This is just a way to generate dough for them so they can keep working on those productions while they put this lame-o effort to bed.
September 27th, 2012 8:55 PM
I tried watching a few of the episodes last season but never could get past the first commercial break. Seems like Berta will say something to make me think of the Charlie years and I find myself watching the syndicated episodes with Charlie Sheen I record while working for later viewing or switch over to one of the old TV program stions.
I cannot stand that Walden character nor what the Alan character has become.
Tonite after enjoying Big Bang Theory as the lead in for 2 and 1/2 aired I switched to AntennaTV for a Maude rerun. Occasionally I get to see Sheen's new series if a friend withDish records it for me and it is good
They probably couldn't get Charlie Sheen back now if they wanted to but it would be nice if they could erase the Walden shark jump as a dream sequence , amnesia or whatever to bring Charlie back.
Oh well there's enough seasons of Charlie Sheen episodes available in syndication and on DVD to let the new 2 1/2 die a slow painful death or whatever as I enj
September 3rd, 2012 3:12 PM
Absolutely pathetic since Charlie Sheen has been fired! Ashton Kutcher is TERRIBLE! this show used to be my favourite, one of the funniest on TV! the Writing was so funny and clever, WHAT HAPPENED???
Ashton Kutcher please do us and yourself a favour and just quit. Charlie Sheen was the heart of the show and the writers used to do a incredible job! now jokes are about Ashton Kutcher playing with a man in a monkey suit, dancing like a retarded and stupid, dull lines! And what with that relationship with that super annoying Zoey??? Charlie used to be a drunk, gambler and chasing women, now we have a retarded boring billionaire in a relationship with an annoying women... GREAT!!! the Old cast is alright but again they were great before and had a great interactions with charlie, now they dont seem to be from the same world with Kutcher.
Lets face it The chemistry is broken, it's time to cancel this mess!
September 2nd, 2012 8:21 PM
The show sucks without Charlie ! What was Lorre even thinking ? What a shame, the show will never be the same