Bart Simpson Quotes
I thought teachers only went outside to smoke and cry.
Same garbage, different dumpster.
Bart: If fairytales have taught us anything, first wives are the best and second wives are terrible.
Homer: Just the opposite of real life.
The last place anyone would expect to see a moon - the sky.
It's one of those unsolved mysteries, like how do my clothes get cleaned and get back in my dresser?
Lisa: You're gonna regret the day you were born.
Bart: I already do, it's too close to Christmas.
Only you can make tree poop boring.
Bart: Who the hell asre Cheech and Chong?
Homer: Cheech and Chong were the Beavis and Butthead of their day!
Bart: Who are Beavis and Butthead?
Bart: Are they robots?
Pharmaceutical Sales Rep: No, robots can develop human feelings. We're graduates of Arizona State.
Pharmaceutical Exec: I scoop them up by the Sorority.
Nerd: This is the nerd fraternity!
Pharmaceutical Exec: Drop them off in research.
Nelson: Did you find any gold?
Bart: Even better, the prospectors left naughty French postcards.
Nelson: Bart, this is fool's porn, I'll take it off your hands.
I just have one question about hair, where does mine start?
Bart: Can I betray the country I pledge allegiance to every day?
CIA Guy #1: You pledge allegiance to the flag.
CIA Guy #2: And the flag is made in China.