The Simpsons

Sundays 8:00 PM on FOX
The simpsons
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Kurt: Milhouse and I are next.
Otto: There's no suspense at your place. Even I hooked up with your old lady. Sorry, kid.
Milhouse: You were my favorite uncle, Uncle Otto.

Milhouse: Is the yellow one lemon or pineapple?
Lunchlady Doris: It's your pet canary

Moe: Get your throwing stuff! Turn the protest into a riot!
Milhouse: How much for a tomato?
Moe: Fresh stuff for a dollar. Rotten is two bucks.
Kirk: Son, do you really need the rotten? I mean, it's not like you're actually gonna hit him.

Nelson: I want you to keep filling your shirt with crud until I get back.
Milhouse: Yes, sir.

Trab pu kcip! Trab pu kcip!

Milhouse: I've seen the Itchy and Scratchy Movie 13 times.
Nelson: I've seen it 17 times!
Bart: You must be getting pretty tired of that movie by now, huh?
Milhouse: No one who saw the movie'd say that!
Nelson: Let's get him!

Mr. Black: Now I must tell you kids Krusty has laryngitis and a bad back so he won't be saying anything or doing anything.
Milhouse: Krusty looks fat.
Lisa: He's really having trouble keeping his balance.
Ralph: He's still funny, but not ha-ha funny.

Mr. Black: I'll take any questions you might have... you? And then uum.... one more.
Milhouse: Can we call you Uncle Blackie?
Mr. Black: No.. last question...

After that fateful day I could never even look at Eliza again. It didn't help that the next day he drank bad well water and went blind.

Milhouse: Uh, that's a nice dress.
Samantha: My dad makes me wear it, I hate it!
Milhouse: Well I hate it too!

Milhouse: Let me try! Will I get beat up today? ... All signs point to yes
Nelson: That ball knows everything. *punch*

How could this happen? We started out like Romeo and Juliet but it ended up in tragedy!

Displaying quotes 49 - 60 of 90 in total

The Simpsons Quotes

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

Wow, now I see why they call you Miss Hoover. You must have been vacuuming for an hour.

Bart