Family Guy
Sundays 9:00 PM on FOXPeter Griffin Quotes
I just bought a giant room full of gold coins that I'm going to dive into like Scrooge McDuck.
You want to have it down at the bank where the Jewish guys can leer at it?
We won! I'm getting a penis butler!
Peter: Hey, check it out! It's another chick! The only other chick in the galaxy!
Lois: I don't like her.
Come by and apply for a Han job and I'll get you off and running! Other websites jerk you around and don't finish what they started but Han job will have you shooting for the stars!
Peter: Whoa, what the hell are these? Hamsters?
Quagmire: They're adorable!
Peter: Who braided your hair? Did the Ewoks braid your hair? So they use spears with wooden tips but understand the finer points of cosmetology?
Lois: I know...it's not as good as Empire.
Hey Leia, you got a date to we-killed-thousands-of-people dance tonight?
Oh yea? Well nobody believed that we would make it but I drink and you use sex as a weapon. That seems to me like a successful New England marriage.
I always wanted a brother or a sister. Instead, I got a broster.
Mr. Washee-Washee: I no have your shirt.
Peter: You yes have my shirt!
Peter: Fine, I go. But this no over! I take picture of Ang Lee
Mr . Washee-Washee: Good! He do too many white people movie anyway!
You no come back ever! I don't like you American. And all you American look alike!
I guess we learned that no matter who you are or where you come from, life is a terrible thing.
