Charlie was a planned baby. What was I? Well, dear, you were...
Evelyn: Charlie was a planned baby.
Alan: What was I?
Evelyn: Well, dear, you were a pitcher of margaritas and a gas station condom
- Alan Harper, Evelyn Harper
- Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 3: "The Sea is a Harsh Mistress"
- Two and a Half Men
- Related Quotes:
- Alan Harper Quotes, Evelyn Harper Quotes, Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 3 Quotes, Two and a Half Men Quotes
- Added by:
- Eric Hochberger
Evelyn: So, how is work?
Evelyn: Are you seeing anybody special?
Evelyn: Charlie, did you ever stop to think that our relationship is strained because you won't let me in? You won't share.
Charlie: You know why I won't share with you, Mom? Because anything I say will be used against me.
Evelyn: Oh please...
Charlie: I have to go to the bathroom, maybe I have a prostate problem. I buy a new Mercedes, you call it a Nazi phallic symbol. I'm seeing someone new, you ask if I'm paying her by the hour, or per schtup!
- Permalink: So, how is work? Fine. Are you seeing anybody special? Nop...
Alan: When was the last time you called mom just to see how she was doing?
Charlie: Uh, whoo. What's today, Sunday? Then never.
Alan: Why don't you start with that?
Charlie: OK, fine.
Alan: Remember her number?
Charlie: I've got it on speed dial. 666. Cute, huh?
- Permalink: When was the last time you called mom just to see how she was do...