The Good Fight
Thursdays on Paramount+The Good Fight Quotes
David Lee: Very funny, though maybe problematic.
Del: Morgan’s act is edgy, and that’s what we want, but now someone has posted this video online, and we’re getting a lot of Twitter pushback.
Liz: Ah, so you’re worried about being canceled?
Del: Ooh, don’t say the c-word, but yeah.
David Lee: Well, we want your business, Mr. Cooper. You want us to sue? We’re ready.
Del: No, I want you to do a sensitivity read.
Liz: Really?
Del: Yes, we have an $8 million contract to stream her act, so we want you to review her set for cultural inaccuracies, representation issues, bias, stereotypes, problematic language, blah blah blah.
Liz: And why?
David Lee: Because clearly we’re one of the best firms in Chicago.
Del: Because you’re a Black firm, and most of Morgan’s jokes touch on racial themes. And we were thinking of bringing you all of our legal business anyway, so this might be a good way to take you for a test drive.
Nancy: Diane, such a pleasure to face you in court. Do you have a minute?
Diane: Ms. Crozier…
Nancy: Nancy’s fine.
Diane: If this is the moment you impress me with all the evidence you have against my husband and suggest he cope a plea, we can do that right here.
Nancy: Certainly. Dylan Pike says Kurt is not only concealing the names of insurrectionists, but that he was the ringleader of those insurrectionists.
Diane: Really? The accused man you threatened with prison threw someone else under the bus. How novel.
Nancy: Diane, if I were your husband, I’d talk. Mr. Pike seemed very convincing, and we know how these things work. The first person who talks gets a deal. The last person who talks gets prison, 20 years to be specific.
Charles: Can I come in?
Carmen: I would rather it was during work hours.
Charles: You know I would too, but we just have 12 minutes to discuss an important issue.
Diane: I think it’s time to talk.
Kurt: It wasn’t a legal issue. It was something for work.
Diane: If you’re keeping it from the FBI, it’s a legal issue. Are you not telling me because I’m your lawyer or because I’m your wife?
Kurt: Because your politics.
Diane: Oh come on, turning in insurrectionists should be our politics.
Kurt: Diane, this works between us because we don’t let our political judgments overwhelm our respect for each other.
Diane: Kurt, I lived through eight years of the Tea Party and four years of Trump, but Jan. 6 changed everything for me. I can’t treat this like a chess game anymore.
Kurt: What is the chess game here? Us? This marriage?
Diane: No, that’s the one thing that’s not a game.
Jay: Is there anything we can’t do?
Mailroom worker: Necrophilia?
Marissa: No that could be funny.
Jay: Autism.
Mailroom worker: Selena Gomez’s kidney transplant.
Diane: That’s bad, David as our boss.
Liz: Yeah, but I have a worse worry.
Diane: OK.
Liz: We were griping about our new client, and two minutes later, David Lee comes running down the stairs to talk to us. That’s quite a coincidence.
Diane: You think he bugged your office?
Liz: I don’t know. You know him better than I do. Would he do something like that?
Diane: Oh yeah.
Liz: Great. So what do we do?
Diane: Have Jay look for bugs at night when we can hide it from David.
Liz: Oh god, if we actually spent this much time lawyering, we’d be Supreme Court justices by now.
Marissa: I can’t do it. I’m sorry.
Wackner: Why not?
Marissa: My boss said no. You don’t need me anyway. Let me connect you with a real lawyer.
Wackner: Marissa, listen to me. I asked you for a reason. You know just enough not to crush what I’m doing here. A real lawyer will look for reasons why not. I need someone to look for reasons why.
Marissa: I can find you someone.
Wackner: I don’t want someone.
I have to admit I’m baffled. How can it be that Chumhum gets away with something any newspaper would go under for doing? Unfortunately, the law is the law. It may be unfair, but it is the constitution. Section 230 stands, and the statute ties my hands.
Judge Friend
David: I want to save the country.
Liz: You want to save it?
David: Yes, don’t you?
Liz: Yes.
David: January 6th changed everything for me, my Road to Damascus moment. Do I have to explain that to Democrats?
Liz: No.
Julius: And I’m not a Democrat.
David: That’s my point. I came to realize we -- say the three of us -- have a lot more in common that we might think. We all love this country. I love this country. It gave my family a start. My dad, he started a small laundry business, sent his son to college, and I made something of myself. Too many people take America for granted. I don’t, and I suspect that you don’t either.
Liz: Well, I don’t think there’s a disagreement there. I think the disagreement is in the detail.
David: Well, let’s start with the details then.
Diane: Wow, I’m surprised Mr. Pike didn’t accuse Kurt of being responsible for 9/11.
Madeline: Certainly, you have a better joke than that.
Diane: No, this isn't a joke to me. Dylan Pike will say anything to reduce his sentence.
Madeline: I do consider his statement with some skepticism, and the only way to get to the truth is with a grand jury. A subpoena has a tendency to sharpen the senses.
Diane: Odd you don’t have a musical cue for that.
Madeline: Hold on. Oops, that’s not right. I can always subpoena you, Kurt.
Diane: Why are there hundreds of teddy bears in our reception?
Marissa: Is that a legal euphemism I don’t understand?
Diane: No, this was sent to you. It’s a Marissa bear.
Marissa: That doesn’t even look like me.
Diane: That would seem to beside the point. What is going on Marissa. Why are there hundreds of bears in our office?
Marissa: Let me find out.
Diane: If you’re finding out, you must have some suspicions, so…
Marissa: I offered some advice to a client who was buying a Build-a-Bear franchise. My guess is this was a thank you.
Diane: What client? You’re not a lawyer. Why do you have clients? Oh my god, this is about that Copy Coop court?
Marissa: I made sure it didn’t interfere with my responsibilities.
Diane: Marissa, no. By participating in that simulacrum of a courtroom you expose this firm to malpractice, sanctions, god knows what else.
Marissa: I’m just offering the judge some advice and helping him with his copyright office.
Diane: If you wish to continue your employment at this firm, you will never do anything like that again. Do you understand?
Diane: If it’s one of the insurrectionists, then you need to tell the Feds.
Kurt: I’m not sure it’s him.
Diane: Who do you think it is?
Kurt: Someone I shoot with.
Diane: Oh my god, then it’s him.
Kurt: He didn’t talk that way. He wasn’t political. He’s a veteran.
Diane: Kurt, that’s the profile.
Kurt: And I don’t drop a dime because he fits a profile.
Diane: What is this, a schoolyard? Drop a dime. This man tried to hang the vice president. He tried to kill Nancy Pelosi.
Kurt: You don’t know that, and I’m not going to be responsible for naming names.
Diane: This isn't McCarthyism.
Kurt: Actually it is.
Diane: They stormed the Capitol.
Kurt: The Feds will threaten me with indictment if I don’t name names even if I’m not sure if they’re responsible, and then they will be asked to name names, and then everyone will get lawyers, and those are the only people who will benefit.
