Thursdays 8:30 PM on CBS
Two-and-a-half-men

Jake: I saw this video called "Topless Co-eds of the Big Ten" and I decided I had to go to college.
Alan: You expect me to pay $30,000-$40,000 a year so you can meet drunk girls who will lift their shirts?
Jake: Yes, please.


Rating: 4.0 / 5.0 (2 Votes)
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Two and a Half Men Quotes, Two and a Half Men Season 8 Episode 11 Quotes, Alan Harper Quotes, Jake Harper Quotes
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Two and a Half Men Season 8 Episode 11 Quotes

Diamonds get you skull in the backseat of a limo. Pottery Barny won't get you dry humped in the back of a city bus.

Charlie

Berta: I also found a half written suicide note in your brother's handwriting. Should I be nervous?
Charlie: You mean that he won't get through with it?

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