Your very own cellphone. Ah, cool! Now, the important thing ...
Alan: Oh, I almost forgot, I got you a little present: your very own cellphone.
Jake: Ah, cool!
Alan: Now, the important thing to remember is that this is not a toy. It's to use in emergencies only.
Jake: "Emergenies?" What emergencies?
Charlie: (whispering) "Dad, come get me. I'm stuffed in my locker and my underwear is wet."
Alan: That only happened once.
- Charlie Harper, Alan Harper, Jake Harper
- Two and a Half Men Season 5 Episode 1: "Large Birds, Spiders and Mom"
- Two and a Half Men
- Related Quotes:
- Charlie Harper Quotes, Alan Harper Quotes, Jake Harper Quotes, Two and a Half Men Season 5 Episode 1 Quotes, Two and a Half Men Quotes
- Added by:
- Eric Hochberger
Charlie: Hey, Berta, how have you been washing my underwear?
Berta: Like I do everything else around here: with a song on my lips and love in my heart.
Charlie: I'm serious. I got a rash in my, you know, private area.
Berta: Private? You get any more traffic down there, you're gonna have to open a Starbucks.
- Permalink: Hey, Berta, how have you been washing my underwear? with a son...
Alan: You sure it's just a rash?
Charlie: What else could it be?
Alan: Uh, well, since we are talking about your private area, it could be anything from Ebola to mad cow disease.
Charlie: You get Ebola from monkeys, right?
Charlie: It's just a rash.
- Permalink: You sure it's just a rash? What else could it be? Uh, well, ...